![]() I was able to speak openly to both of them about her only been 13 and said that they could come to me about anything and I would be supportive. We were always chatting about anything and everything. I spent a lot of time with my daughter and boyfriend, we all got on great. I warmed immediately to this boy and he fit really easily into the family. My thinking has always been, if they are asking, they are wanting to know, and if they can't ask me, they will ask someone else, who may not know themselves. I am a very open and honest mum and have always spoke openly with my kids about anything they wanted to talk about. Especially with her only being 13, I needed and wanted to get to know this person well, who she was starting to spend a lot with. I met him almost immediately, we are a large, close family and I always wanted my kids partners to be welcomed and for us all to get on. They had been "talking" on and off for about 6 months prior to going official, so by the time they went official, they were already pretty close. This boy is 2 school years above her, it works out about 18 months older than her. At the beginning of May this year, 5 months ago, she started her first relationship. Can hardly believe I'm writing this but after a week of hardly no sleep and relationship at breaking point, I need more outside advice. See all the photos of the event in the slideshow above (very much not NSFW), or check out the photos from last year's pageant right here. Kumar seemed genuinely touched at the turnout and oddly proud of his new title. Last year’s winner, Nick Gilronan, returned to the stage to present Kumar with the glitter encrusted, penis-spired crown amidst a terrible stench of sewage, which, by all accounts, is a pageant tradition (we didn’t feel like enquiring further). Raj Kumar donned a traditional Indian costume and displayed his agility in a Bollywood-tinged dance routine that seduced judge Caroline Fox, who joined him onstage for a bump and grind.Īs ever, the act with the lowest score won, and audience favorite and New Delhi native Raj Kumar-a 28-year-old Fulbright scholar who lives on the Upper East Side and works in digital advertising-romped away with the win. Rufio read punny jokes from his iPhone with surprising charm, while Twig N’ Berries sang an uncomfortable, flat-falling duet with Cherry Pitz, then tried to get the audience back with some yoga moves. Peter Parker broke a sweat with a characteristically awkward but high-spirited break-dancing number, dressed head to toe in a Spider-Man costume. The Puzzle Master performed a surprisingly smooth tease and tuck routine, which won him high scores with both the judges and the audience. Though always fully covered, this costume change revealed the family jewels most clearly, and honestly, Rufio might as well have been disqualified for not being nearly small enough.Ĭherry Pitz graced the bar top with two intermission burlesque sets, which provided an appetizer for the talent portion of the afternoon. Once the second round of judging was underway, the guys paraded across the bar wearing dainty mesh tangas. Charisma, wit and sweetness, however, won out over showboating or a pretty face.Īstoria comedy band Afterbirth Monkey provided intermission entertainment with songs about-you guessed it-penis size, complete with plastic penis water guns and balloon-art dicks. During this hard-hitting opening round, Raj Kumar got points knocked off for being too cutesy, while Peter Parker-the only masked contestant this year-played the awkward wacko card to great effect. Extra points were handed out for originality (and in some cases, their appreciation of cunnilingus). The pool of contestants were whittled down to five after a casual screening process, with the lucky (or unlucky, depending on your point of view) finalists comprising of the somewhat twisted Puzzle Master, the cocky Rufio, returning contestant the incognito “Peter Parker,” all-American blond “Twig N’ Berries" and the benevolent Indian “Raj Kumar.” The group were then asked such revealing questions as their favorite sexual position and their responses were saucily evaluated by the judges. RECOMMENDED: Full coverage on the Smallest Penis in Brooklyn Pageant talk-show host Caroline Fox, sex educator Kendall McKenzie and Bobbie Chaset, the owner of Kings County Bar and mastermind behind the pageant. ![]() The main event, of course, was the interaction between the audience, judges and those boys brave enough to bare their modest members. The second annual event drew a fat line that stretched halfway down Seigel Street in Bushwick this past Saturday, and those who were lucky enough to fit into the diminutive Kings County Bar were treated to MC Chicken Bitches' sweet and sharp tongue, great music and the effervescence of burlesque performer Cherry Pitz. ![]() Apparently, the Smallest Penis in Brooklyn Pageant is a grower. ![]()
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